Funny Confucius Quotes: Funny Confucius quotes playfully mix humor with the style of Confucian wisdom, taking a light-hearted approach to traditional philosophical sayings. While Confucius was known for his deep teachings on ethics, morality, and social relationships, these humorous interpretations add a comedic twist to his legacy.
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Funny Confucius Quotes
- Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
- Woman who flies airplane upside down has crack up.
- Man who pushes piano down mineshaft get A flat minor.
- Girl who sits on jigsaw puzzle is going to get a big surprise.
- Man who jumps off cliff jumps to a conclusion.
- Woman who cooks carrots and peas in same pot not sanitary.
- Man who fishes in another man’s well often catches crabs.
- Man who drives like hell is bound to get there.
- Woman who puts husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.
- Man who stands on street corner with hands in pockets doesn’t feel crazy, feels nuts.
- Man who runs in front of car gets tired, but man who runs behind car gets exhausted.
Man who sneezes without a tissue takes matters into his own hands.
- Man who stands on paper to be high on current events.
- Man who gets hit by car is often called Jaywalker.
- Man who falls into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
- Man who walks through airport door sideways is going to Bangkok.
- Man who drives like lightning is bound to crash like thunder.
- Man who puts head in lion’s mouth gets headache.
- Man who keeps feet firmly on ground has trouble putting on pants.
Man who crosses the ocean twice without washing is a dirty double-crosser.
Famous Funny Confucius Quotes
- Man who plays with fire gets burnt fingers.
- Man who stands on hill with mouth open will wait long time for roast duck to drop in.
- Man who loses key to girlfriend’s apartment gets no new key.
- Man who goes to bed with itchy butt wakes up with smelly finger.
- Man who run behind car get exhausted, but man who run in front of car get tired.
- Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
- Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
- Man who eats photo of father, soon spitting-image of father.
- Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger.
- Man who pulls on woman’s bra-strap may get bust in face.
- Man who puts head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
- Man who fishes in other man’s well often catches crabs.
- Man who runs in front of car gets tired, but man who runs behind car gets exhausted.
- Man who jump off cliff, jump to conclusion.
Famous Funny Confucius Quotes
- Man who leaps off cliff jumps to a conclusion.
- Man who makes mistake in elevator is wrong on many levels.
- Man who makes love to woman on hill not on level.
- Man who stand on street corner with hands in pockets feels cocky all day.
- Man who reads a book on ethics is condemned to hell.
- Man who stands on hill with mouth open will wait long time for roast duck to drop in.
- Man who puts head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
- Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
- Man who eats photo of father, soon spitting-image of father.
- Man who goes to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger.
- Man who pulls on woman’s bra-strap may get bust in face.
- Man who puts head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
- Man who fishes in other man’s well often catches crabs.
Man who runs in front of car gets tired, but man who runs behind car gets exhausted.
- Man who jump off cliff, jump to conclusion.
- Man who leaps off cliff jumps to a conclusion.
Funny Confucius Quotes
- Man who makes mistake in elevator is wrong on many levels.
- Man who makes love to woman on hill not on level.
- Man who stand on street corner with hands in pockets feels cocky all day.
- Man who reads a book on ethics is condemned to hell.
- Man who stands on hill with mouth open will wait long time for roast duck to drop in.
Man who puts head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
- Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
- Man who eats photo of father, soon spitting-image of father.
- Man who goes to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger.
- Man who pulls on woman’s bra-strap may get bust in face.
- Man who puts head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
- Man who fishes in other man’s well often catches crabs.
- Man who runs in front of car gets tired, but man who runs behind car gets exhausted.
- Man who jump off cliff, jump to conclusion.
- Man who leaps off cliff jumps to a conclusion.
- Man who makes mistake in elevator is wrong on many levels.
- Man who makes love to woman on hill not on level.
- Man who stand on street corner with hands in pockets feels cocky all day.
Funny Confucius Quotes
- Man who reads a book on ethics is condemned to hell.
- Man who stands on hill with mouth open will wait long time for roast duck to drop in.
- Man who puts head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
- Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
- Man who eats photo of father, soon spitting-image of father.
- Man who goes to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger.
Famous Funny Confucius Quotes
- Man who pulls on woman’s bra-strap may get bust in face.
- Man who puts head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
- Man who fishes in other man’s well often catches crabs.
- Man who runs in front of car gets tired, but man who runs behind car gets exhausted.
Man who jump off cliff, jump to conclusion.
- Man who leaps off cliff jumps to a conclusion.
- Man who makes mistake in elevator is wrong on many levels.
Man who makes love to woman on hill not on level.
- Man who stand on street corner with hands in pockets feels cocky all day.
- Man who reads a book on ethics is condemned to hell.
- Man who stands on hill with mouth open will wait long time for roast duck to drop in.